It was my last day at work and although i had spent just a month here i still felt a bit sad walking out of there for probably the last time. i was in no mood to take a cab and besides i wanted to do something symbolic. Walking was really not my thing, but i decided to do it anyway. Unlike most days, the weather was quite pleasant. The air was fresh and cool causing tiny goose pimples to form on my skin as it filled my congested lungs. Foolish, romanticizing couples filled the length of the concrete promenade. How i wanted to smack one of them and make place for my bottom! But i walked ahead anyway and found some place next to this bunch of old men working out. You know basic aerobics, stretches and all. i sat facing the road, turned sideways to grasp a view of the sea, closed my eyes and took in the sound of the waves breaking at the rocks. i thought of the times when i would come here with my first boyfriend who, by the way, also happened to be my closest friend. We would sit for hours, sometimes talking [i would do most of the talking], sometimes quite, just enjoying the moment. There were also times when we’d watch the cars and choose which one would be ours.
i opened my eyes and continued to gaze at the sea and beyond. i don’t know when and how but my vision began to blur. Tears had welled up in my eyes. There were times like this, when i didn’t know why the tears came, but they came anyway. It took me back to the memory of when i had cried uncontrollably for a good fifteen minutes in front of you. My eyes had puffed up and my nose had turned red making me look like Rudolf. But you didn’t notice, i guess, because you were busy trying to convince me for an ice cream saying it would make me feel better. i eventually refused it then [I still haven’t figured out why]. But nothing stopped me now. i walked briskly, almost running to Baskin n Robbins as if they would run out of my favourite dark chocolate flavour at eleven in the morning. i ordered myself a triple scoop of and dunked my mouth into my ice cream and ate like i’d never seen ice cream before [after all, this was also my first meal for the day.] i got weird looks from the strangers who passed me by. i don’t blame them. Whenever i have chocolate ice cream my face automatically produces orgasmic reactions. i think it has to do with the chocolate. But yeah, as i was saying, ice cream really did help me feel better. i was so elated that i didn’t give a tiny rat’s ass about the looks, as long as my tears had dried i was content. A serious yet fun filled recommendatoin - have an ice cream when you're down. It helps…
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
nightmare
Gunshots fill her ears…Masked faces looking for her…While she’s looking for her friend…She finds a safe corner to hide…Footsteps resound in the corridors…Getting louder with each thud…She holds her breath …Cowering deeper into the corner…Wishing she could breathe free again…The foot steps pass her by…Slowly fading away…She heaves a sigh of relief…Almost instantly a hand grabs her neck…It’s him, one of the masked faces…She can see nothing but his eyes…Bloodshot and cold…They pierce into her terrified gaze
His gun reaches her temples…She squeezes her eyes shut waiting to hear her final gunshot…instead he drags down to the basement…close to the exit…she opens her eyes…his bloodshot glare almost cutting through the fear in her eyes…his eyes become soft…he releases his grip on her hand…he continues glaring at her…by now her heart has reached up her mouth…she cringes at the thought of his touch…why can’t he just blow her brains…she’d prefer that rather than imagine what’s coming her way…he draws her closer almost squeezing her lungs…and then lets her go and slowly begins to back off…she’s free or not, she can’t seem to understand…’go’, he howls back at her…’and don’t look back. Now go.’
She wakes up drenched in sweat and she can’t understand why. It looks as if she was running…was she???
His gun reaches her temples…She squeezes her eyes shut waiting to hear her final gunshot…instead he drags down to the basement…close to the exit…she opens her eyes…his bloodshot glare almost cutting through the fear in her eyes…his eyes become soft…he releases his grip on her hand…he continues glaring at her…by now her heart has reached up her mouth…she cringes at the thought of his touch…why can’t he just blow her brains…she’d prefer that rather than imagine what’s coming her way…he draws her closer almost squeezing her lungs…and then lets her go and slowly begins to back off…she’s free or not, she can’t seem to understand…’go’, he howls back at her…’and don’t look back. Now go.’
She wakes up drenched in sweat and she can’t understand why. It looks as if she was running…was she???
Sunday, December 7, 2008
jasmine....
your laughter still resonates
amidst the routine sounds
your eternal smile
still brings with it the sunshine
the memories still alive
they don’t seem to fade away
i stand now
where we had stood before
to watch the fireworks
and look upto the sky
searching for a sign
but the blue sky stares back at me
bluer than before
the sun peeks out
from behind the clouds
i squint and close my eyes
in an attempt to avoid its glare
images of your smiling face
cross my eyes
i open my eyes
and smile back at the sun
i’ve got my sign…
amidst the routine sounds
your eternal smile
still brings with it the sunshine
the memories still alive
they don’t seem to fade away
i stand now
where we had stood before
to watch the fireworks
and look upto the sky
searching for a sign
but the blue sky stares back at me
bluer than before
the sun peeks out
from behind the clouds
i squint and close my eyes
in an attempt to avoid its glare
images of your smiling face
cross my eyes
i open my eyes
and smile back at the sun
i’ve got my sign…
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
NOT JUST YET....
I walked back, this Monday into the lobby of the Oberoi, Mumbai. Although I had heard that it was badly damaged, nothing could prepare me for what I saw inside. As one of my friends said, ‘it's a sight for sore eyes.’ This place that I had trained in for close to a month resembled a war zone. As we went about the winding up activities, I couldn’t stop the fear present inside me. As I walked through the soot laden corridors, I couldn’t stop myself from taking a look behind me to check if there was anyone. Even while walking in the service corridors (used by staff), I keep myself alert to any sound. I believe in spirits and ghosts. I believe they exist and watch over you. When I am in the corridors checking for left over unclaimed baggage, I have this strange feeling that there are many eyes on me. And then I turn around to nothing.
After spending two nights holed up in a room alone at the Trident, Nariman Point, I don’t think I will ever stop checking behind and around me. Fear and loss, don’t make a good combination. My initial bravado was replaced with fear after I found out that Jasmine was killed by these merciless animals. I felt paralyzed or I guess it was my fear because after that I was afraid to move, use the loo, sneeze and even breathe. The reason that roused my fear was also the reason that calmed me down. Images of her eternally smiling face cropped up before me. I was still a little scared, but I was smiling now. Friends kept calling; some were reassuring me with their prayers, while I was assuring most with my light hearted comments. It was not easy to remain calm. I kept saying a few prayers every time that I heard any sound. I even cried to relieve myself of the stress. I did everything I could because I did not want to die. I am not scared of death, but just not yet…As I write this down, I feel guilty and helpless. Guilty because I came out alive and helpless because at the time that I had locked myself in the safety of a room I could have escaped and come down to help save other lives. The ordeal doesn’t end here, as we all know it. There is more to come as threatened by the militants. I pray the army, NSG and whatever other security and intelligence we have are able to avert or combat a crisis like this…
After spending two nights holed up in a room alone at the Trident, Nariman Point, I don’t think I will ever stop checking behind and around me. Fear and loss, don’t make a good combination. My initial bravado was replaced with fear after I found out that Jasmine was killed by these merciless animals. I felt paralyzed or I guess it was my fear because after that I was afraid to move, use the loo, sneeze and even breathe. The reason that roused my fear was also the reason that calmed me down. Images of her eternally smiling face cropped up before me. I was still a little scared, but I was smiling now. Friends kept calling; some were reassuring me with their prayers, while I was assuring most with my light hearted comments. It was not easy to remain calm. I kept saying a few prayers every time that I heard any sound. I even cried to relieve myself of the stress. I did everything I could because I did not want to die. I am not scared of death, but just not yet…As I write this down, I feel guilty and helpless. Guilty because I came out alive and helpless because at the time that I had locked myself in the safety of a room I could have escaped and come down to help save other lives. The ordeal doesn’t end here, as we all know it. There is more to come as threatened by the militants. I pray the army, NSG and whatever other security and intelligence we have are able to avert or combat a crisis like this…
Sunday, November 23, 2008
twisted tales
PART I
I’m tired. My work wasn’t exactly pleasing my boss, the presentation for which I had worked my ass off didn’t exactly create the stir I had prepared it to create, my eyes were droopy, I couldn’t catch up on enough sleep due to the horrid, pot filled roads heading out of the airport, my sister’s marriage was falling apart; the only thought that brought a smile to my gloomy face was that of returning to the comfort of you. I wanted to surprise you. It was our wedding anniversary after all. Marriage counselling seemed to be working but you still seemed aloof. Maybe you were still getting used to the idea of seeking help.
I try not to make any sound as I turn in the key to the front door and tip toe my way down the hall. I peek into our bedroom but you’re not there. You’re not in the bathroom or the kitchen or the study. You’re phone is switched off. I wonder where you are.
It’s way past midnight when you walk in. I see the look of shock and then surprise before a smile curves your lips. You kiss me and drown all my queries. They say that you only value what you have when it’s gone. Love making was never this sweet. I was happy being close to you. The jigsaw of our marriage was finally falling in place.
PART II
It’s been months since you’ve touched me. It feels like a lifetime. You don’t want me anymore. I’m alone yet again. It’s that time of the day, when all I want to do is burst out and cry. I feel defeated. But I’m not letting go this time. I need to know what’s happening. Tonight we’re gonna talk. If this marriage is not going to work out , we might as well give up and live freely. No more tears, no more pain.
I walk into our apartment to a familiar song. Wait, that’s my favourite song and it's coming from our bedroom. I move towards the music and in my head I brace myself for what I have come here to do. My mind’s made up and there’s no turning back. I want to avenge the months of loneliness. I push through our bedroom door and I black out…
PART III
I’ve moved out of that apartment. Well, heck I’ve moved out of the city now. Each place, each road, each landmark had a memory of the two of you. I’m happier and more content with my work and life. Jai has been my anchor throughout, unquestioning and uncomplaining of my tantrums and demands.
I come back home each day to the faces of my bratty nephews and a paranoid sister who thinks that I may just kill myself someday.
The kids are asleep and the dishes done. We sit down in the verandah, catching up on our occasional cigarette. She gives me that look again. Like always I try and avoid her gaze. But there’s something about that look today which gives me a feeling that there’s no escape. The time had come to let her in where only Jai had been before.
“…I blacked out. I had walked into Tarun having sex my best friend in my bed.”
“Who Malini?”
“No. Rishi”
I’m tired. My work wasn’t exactly pleasing my boss, the presentation for which I had worked my ass off didn’t exactly create the stir I had prepared it to create, my eyes were droopy, I couldn’t catch up on enough sleep due to the horrid, pot filled roads heading out of the airport, my sister’s marriage was falling apart; the only thought that brought a smile to my gloomy face was that of returning to the comfort of you. I wanted to surprise you. It was our wedding anniversary after all. Marriage counselling seemed to be working but you still seemed aloof. Maybe you were still getting used to the idea of seeking help.
I try not to make any sound as I turn in the key to the front door and tip toe my way down the hall. I peek into our bedroom but you’re not there. You’re not in the bathroom or the kitchen or the study. You’re phone is switched off. I wonder where you are.
It’s way past midnight when you walk in. I see the look of shock and then surprise before a smile curves your lips. You kiss me and drown all my queries. They say that you only value what you have when it’s gone. Love making was never this sweet. I was happy being close to you. The jigsaw of our marriage was finally falling in place.
PART II
It’s been months since you’ve touched me. It feels like a lifetime. You don’t want me anymore. I’m alone yet again. It’s that time of the day, when all I want to do is burst out and cry. I feel defeated. But I’m not letting go this time. I need to know what’s happening. Tonight we’re gonna talk. If this marriage is not going to work out , we might as well give up and live freely. No more tears, no more pain.
I walk into our apartment to a familiar song. Wait, that’s my favourite song and it's coming from our bedroom. I move towards the music and in my head I brace myself for what I have come here to do. My mind’s made up and there’s no turning back. I want to avenge the months of loneliness. I push through our bedroom door and I black out…
PART III
I’ve moved out of that apartment. Well, heck I’ve moved out of the city now. Each place, each road, each landmark had a memory of the two of you. I’m happier and more content with my work and life. Jai has been my anchor throughout, unquestioning and uncomplaining of my tantrums and demands.
I come back home each day to the faces of my bratty nephews and a paranoid sister who thinks that I may just kill myself someday.
The kids are asleep and the dishes done. We sit down in the verandah, catching up on our occasional cigarette. She gives me that look again. Like always I try and avoid her gaze. But there’s something about that look today which gives me a feeling that there’s no escape. The time had come to let her in where only Jai had been before.
“…I blacked out. I had walked into Tarun having sex my best friend in my bed.”
“Who Malini?”
“No. Rishi”
if someday
If someday the earth turned completely green
I would want to close my eyes
And walk bare foot
On the damp grass
Run my fingers through
Its tall blades
Feel the petals
And imagine their colours
Breath fresh wind
And let it caress my hair
Feel the dewdrops
On my forehead
Feel the rays of the sun
Radiate each drop
As they trickle down
To my lips
And then I feel
A rough, familiar touch
Dusting the pollens
Stuck to my cheek
I know it’s you
But what if its not
I don’t want to open my eyes
To disappointment
And yet I do
Only to smile back
To a familiar face
I would want to close my eyes
And walk bare foot
On the damp grass
Run my fingers through
Its tall blades
Feel the petals
And imagine their colours
Breath fresh wind
And let it caress my hair
Feel the dewdrops
On my forehead
Feel the rays of the sun
Radiate each drop
As they trickle down
To my lips
And then I feel
A rough, familiar touch
Dusting the pollens
Stuck to my cheek
I know it’s you
But what if its not
I don’t want to open my eyes
To disappointment
And yet I do
Only to smile back
To a familiar face
Enclosed thoughts
Where am i?
What am I doing here?
Enclosed places
Unknown faces
Trying to kill time
But it just doesn’t pass
Loneliness drives my thoughts to the extreme
Familiar faces seem miles away
But whose face can I call familiar
When the only face I’m certain of
Is mine….
What am I doing here?
Enclosed places
Unknown faces
Trying to kill time
But it just doesn’t pass
Loneliness drives my thoughts to the extreme
Familiar faces seem miles away
But whose face can I call familiar
When the only face I’m certain of
Is mine….
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Conversations
Me: don’t tell anyone about this ok…it’s just between you and
me…promise...
Him: hmhmm
Me: say promise
Him: said
Me: say it...i didn't hear
Him: you cant...we are far off
Me: then how would i know if u really said it?
Him: trust
Me: i trust u
Him: then chill
Me: I’m freezing
me…promise...
Him: hmhmm
Me: say promise
Him: said
Me: say it...i didn't hear
Him: you cant...we are far off
Me: then how would i know if u really said it?
Him: trust
Me: i trust u
Him: then chill
Me: I’m freezing
Love is
Love is…
Letting her go just because you think
She’ll be happy with someone else…
Love is…
dialling his number and disconnecting the call before his phone rings
Love is…
typing out a message each day and not sending it because you’re so scared of the outcome
Love is…
hoping he’ll pick up your call someday
Love is…
hoping to hear his voice again
Love is…
believing that some day when the phone rings it will be him
Love is…
hoping against hope
Love is…
Love is…
I don’t know what love is anymore…
Letting her go just because you think
She’ll be happy with someone else…
Love is…
dialling his number and disconnecting the call before his phone rings
Love is…
typing out a message each day and not sending it because you’re so scared of the outcome
Love is…
hoping he’ll pick up your call someday
Love is…
hoping to hear his voice again
Love is…
believing that some day when the phone rings it will be him
Love is…
hoping against hope
Love is…
Love is…
I don’t know what love is anymore…
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Alone
I’m walking down the road
On my own
I’m listening to my music
It makes me smile
People look at me
And think I’m insane
Maybe I am
My happiness is mine
My troubles are mine
I talk to myself
I laugh with myself
I even cry with myself
There’s no one I can call friend
I am my best friend
I don’t need another
I’m better off alone
On my own
I’m listening to my music
It makes me smile
People look at me
And think I’m insane
Maybe I am
My happiness is mine
My troubles are mine
I talk to myself
I laugh with myself
I even cry with myself
There’s no one I can call friend
I am my best friend
I don’t need another
I’m better off alone
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
saying goodbye
I want you to fade away to become a distant memory but you don’t. i eat, i sleep, i work and do other things all while making a conscious effort not to think about you, but you’re always there at the back of my mind. I don’t allow you to take centre stage. It’s only in the fleeting moments of my loneliness that I let the memories of you to come forward. Actually I don’t have to let them; they just find a way to seep through. But I feel nothing, unlike before. Then I pick up the phone to dial your number. Almost always I disconnect the call before it rings. But today I let it ring, that familiar song that always brings a smile to my face even now. You picked up but surprisingly I felt nothing when I heard you’re voice, unlike before. I felt nothing when I spoke to you, unlike before. I felt nothing when we hung up, unlike before. I guess this means I’ve gotten over you. I’ve let you go. For some reason I feel this strange sense of peace take over when I say I’ve let you go.
I guess I’ll never be able to stop the memories from surfacing in my mind. A few years into the future, they will blur and maybe then I will remember you only if I see a similar car to yours or if I meet another person with the same name as yours.
I guess I’ll never be able to stop the memories from surfacing in my mind. A few years into the future, they will blur and maybe then I will remember you only if I see a similar car to yours or if I meet another person with the same name as yours.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
wish you were here
i’m sitting by the window
watching the sun fade away
it seems beautiful
but I guess it would be better
from the promenade
but the feeling of being alone
would be the same
i wish you were here
i’m sitting at the promenade
watching the fireworks
illuminating the skyline
with each burst
a riot of colours explodes
radiating on my face
i wish you were here
i close my eyes
and imagine you here
your hand in mine
your chin resting on my shoulder
your breath on my collar bone
i open my eyes
i wish you were here
watching the sun fade away
it seems beautiful
but I guess it would be better
from the promenade
but the feeling of being alone
would be the same
i wish you were here
i’m sitting at the promenade
watching the fireworks
illuminating the skyline
with each burst
a riot of colours explodes
radiating on my face
i wish you were here
i close my eyes
and imagine you here
your hand in mine
your chin resting on my shoulder
your breath on my collar bone
i open my eyes
i wish you were here
Thursday, October 23, 2008
who's miracle is it anyway?
We go on all our lives waiting for a miracle
Experts say every moment is a miracle
You just have to look harder
My eye sight is very weak I guess
Does waking up each morning count for a miracle?
Does the fact that you’re waking up mean something to someone count for a miracle?
Does falling in love with someone count for a miracle?
The only question here being – whose miracle is it?
Experts say every moment is a miracle
You just have to look harder
My eye sight is very weak I guess
Does waking up each morning count for a miracle?
Does the fact that you’re waking up mean something to someone count for a miracle?
Does falling in love with someone count for a miracle?
The only question here being – whose miracle is it?
torn between two
i’m staring at a blank screen
wondering what to write
i want to write about him
but all i can think of is you
you walked away
when i needed you the most
and now that i’ve found love again
you come back to reclaim your place
you didn’t say why you’d left
you don’t say why you’re back
what is it that you want
i wish i knew
i don’t want you back
the decision is made
then why does hesitation
pursue my trail
i try to reason
but there’s no logic to love
and then the question hits
am i in love?
maybe i am
but is it you?
i cannot say anymore
wondering what to write
i want to write about him
but all i can think of is you
you walked away
when i needed you the most
and now that i’ve found love again
you come back to reclaim your place
you didn’t say why you’d left
you don’t say why you’re back
what is it that you want
i wish i knew
i don’t want you back
the decision is made
then why does hesitation
pursue my trail
i try to reason
but there’s no logic to love
and then the question hits
am i in love?
maybe i am
but is it you?
i cannot say anymore
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
I’m alone
walking into nowhere
just following the sunbeam
that lightens the way
making it easy
for me to see
the beauty of His creation…
yet i blind myself
for the fears i have inside,
take over
compelling me to hide within…
lack of love
lack of companionship
i walk forward
following the sunbeam
which inevitably leads me to the dark…
it’s windy and i’m cold
i feel more alone than ever
but i continue walking
with hope of something better
pushing my way through the dense branches
suddenly i emerge into the light
a white ray
as i look up i see the sun has become white
and the sky dark
contrasting each other
the darkness now seems beautiful
i lay down on the damp sand
and gaze up
searching for the artist Himself…
walking into nowhere
just following the sunbeam
that lightens the way
making it easy
for me to see
the beauty of His creation…
yet i blind myself
for the fears i have inside,
take over
compelling me to hide within…
lack of love
lack of companionship
i walk forward
following the sunbeam
which inevitably leads me to the dark…
it’s windy and i’m cold
i feel more alone than ever
but i continue walking
with hope of something better
pushing my way through the dense branches
suddenly i emerge into the light
a white ray
as i look up i see the sun has become white
and the sky dark
contrasting each other
the darkness now seems beautiful
i lay down on the damp sand
and gaze up
searching for the artist Himself…
He does not understand
The ache of her heart
The want
Of his love
How must she make him see…
Her forlorn eyes
Patiently waiting for his return
Sometimes letting a tear slip by
Before finding her composure again
How must she make him see…
She doesn’t understand
Why he has turned his back
Her heart doesn’t know any reason or logic
Her heart only knows to love unconditionally
How must she make him see…
Has he found another?
She has no complains
All she asks is to know
Whether another loves him as much as she does or more
If only he would tell her
She would rest peacefully, but
How must she make him see…
The ache of her heart
The want
Of his love
How must she make him see…
Her forlorn eyes
Patiently waiting for his return
Sometimes letting a tear slip by
Before finding her composure again
How must she make him see…
She doesn’t understand
Why he has turned his back
Her heart doesn’t know any reason or logic
Her heart only knows to love unconditionally
How must she make him see…
Has he found another?
She has no complains
All she asks is to know
Whether another loves him as much as she does or more
If only he would tell her
She would rest peacefully, but
How must she make him see…
Words can never
describe the pain within
only the eyes hold the secrets
each action
each trait
dominated by the lessons
learnt from pain…
below the surface
insecurity bursts like the waves
with every moment comes
the desire to scream
to give way
to emotions locked with time
resentment waiting to explode
and yet the lips remain sealed
its contents that are waiting
to pour out
can destroy the characters
in the play of life
this is the story thus
knowing no end
the hurt faded away
the wounds concealed
the pain buried within
secured by a lock
no knowledge of the key
let it not be found
its safer that way…
describe the pain within
only the eyes hold the secrets
each action
each trait
dominated by the lessons
learnt from pain…
below the surface
insecurity bursts like the waves
with every moment comes
the desire to scream
to give way
to emotions locked with time
resentment waiting to explode
and yet the lips remain sealed
its contents that are waiting
to pour out
can destroy the characters
in the play of life
this is the story thus
knowing no end
the hurt faded away
the wounds concealed
the pain buried within
secured by a lock
no knowledge of the key
let it not be found
its safer that way…
Thursday, October 9, 2008
All you do is be yourself
Someone you’re afraid to be
Someone you’ve never showed before
Nobody has ever understood
They always seem to mock
Then you came along
And made it seem nice
You made it alright
You made me your world
You became my friend
Each moment without you felt incomplete
My days filled with your words
And my nights with your thoughts
My hand entwined in yours
Whenever we were together
And then in just a moment
The warmth of your hand vanished
Your fingers left mine
I opened my eyes to find
That you were gone
In the darkness of the night
I saw your shadow in the sand
And your fingers entwined in her hand
The ocean fills up with my tears
The thunder steals my cries
I wait at the point we always met
With bated breath
And floating hope
Someday I may see
You walking towards me
To hold my hand again
To complete me…
Someone you’re afraid to be
Someone you’ve never showed before
Nobody has ever understood
They always seem to mock
Then you came along
And made it seem nice
You made it alright
You made me your world
You became my friend
Each moment without you felt incomplete
My days filled with your words
And my nights with your thoughts
My hand entwined in yours
Whenever we were together
And then in just a moment
The warmth of your hand vanished
Your fingers left mine
I opened my eyes to find
That you were gone
In the darkness of the night
I saw your shadow in the sand
And your fingers entwined in her hand
The ocean fills up with my tears
The thunder steals my cries
I wait at the point we always met
With bated breath
And floating hope
Someday I may see
You walking towards me
To hold my hand again
To complete me…
Friday, July 11, 2008
There is a power failure again but i don't have the inclination to light a candle. Instead i light a cigarette. I seem to like the darkness and the eerie silence it brings along. It is windy outside. My mind has begun playing tricks with me. Some sound to my right, i turn and look but there's nothing. I turn back to my original position. I strain my ears to catch the slightest sound or movement. My heart is pounding hard. There is a tingling sensation at the bottom of my gut and i can't figure out why. Shit! i'm not alone, there is somebody else in the house. I toss my cigarette into the bin at my feet and slowly rise from my seat, trying not to create any sound. But i guess i'm too late. I can already feel someone behind me and it's close enough because i can hear it breathing. I muster all the courage in my bones and turn around and almost laugh to myself with relief because in the sparce moonlight i see your face.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Monday, June 30, 2008
Reminder
i don't like the rains anymore
'cause they remind me of you
i don't like that car anymore
'cause it reminds me of you
i don't like giving head massages anymore
'cause it reminds me of you
i don't look at my rough fingers anymore
'cause they remind me of you
i don't like looking at myself in the mirror anymore
'cause it reminds me of you...
'cause they remind me of you
i don't like that car anymore
'cause it reminds me of you
i don't like giving head massages anymore
'cause it reminds me of you
i don't look at my rough fingers anymore
'cause they remind me of you
i don't like looking at myself in the mirror anymore
'cause it reminds me of you...
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
It rains only in the nights now and that's when i miss you the most. You love the rain, you love getting drenched in the rain. I love the rain too but i prefer to stay inside and watch. That's one difference, you'd say. I'd say there are more. But does it matter? Do these differences matter? What have i been trying to do? How could i be so stupid? I was trying to make you fall in love with me. I cannot do that. Nobody can make anyone fall in love with them.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Now i know why they say love turns you world upside down
Now i know why they say its only when you fall in love that it lasts forever
When love enters your life in unimaginable ways
It lightens your nights
And even your days
Love makes you patient
Love makes you kind
They say love is everywhere
But why can't i find
The infinity of its happiness
The intensity of its feel
Its rush so magical
And yet so real
When will this wait be over
Or will times like these always hover
Blinded by hope i am still holding
This string that binds
Forever uncomplaining...
Now i know why they say its only when you fall in love that it lasts forever
When love enters your life in unimaginable ways
It lightens your nights
And even your days
Love makes you patient
Love makes you kind
They say love is everywhere
But why can't i find
The infinity of its happiness
The intensity of its feel
Its rush so magical
And yet so real
When will this wait be over
Or will times like these always hover
Blinded by hope i am still holding
This string that binds
Forever uncomplaining...
Special
There's somethin in your eyes
That makes me wanna lose myself
That makes me wanna lose myself
In your eyes
There's somethin in your voice
That makes my heart beat fast
God i hope this feelin lasts
For the rest of my life
And if you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long i've waited for your touch
And if you knew how happy
You are makin me feel
I never thought i'd love anyone so much...
It feels like home to me
It feels like home to me
It feels like i'm already there where i came from
It feels like home to me
It feels like home to me
It feels like i'm always there where i belong....
Well...sometimes one can't find the right words to describe how one feels...
The mind just goes blank, vocabulary fails you..or maybe, just maybe this is 'that feeling' for which words are just not good enough...and then comes this song, that's says everything you've ever wanted to say to the 'that person...' It's as if it were written just for 'that moment'...just for that person..
What do you say then?? God bless the lyricist!!!!
That makes me wanna lose myself
That makes me wanna lose myself
In your eyes
There's somethin in your voice
That makes my heart beat fast
God i hope this feelin lasts
For the rest of my life
And if you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long i've waited for your touch
And if you knew how happy
You are makin me feel
I never thought i'd love anyone so much...
It feels like home to me
It feels like home to me
It feels like i'm already there where i came from
It feels like home to me
It feels like home to me
It feels like i'm always there where i belong....
Well...sometimes one can't find the right words to describe how one feels...
The mind just goes blank, vocabulary fails you..or maybe, just maybe this is 'that feeling' for which words are just not good enough...and then comes this song, that's says everything you've ever wanted to say to the 'that person...' It's as if it were written just for 'that moment'...just for that person..
What do you say then?? God bless the lyricist!!!!
Thursday, June 5, 2008
rain
Its raining outside,
And you love the rain
Well so do i
Its an amazing feeling to get drenched
Under the warm trickles of water
With the sun shining above your head
And the clouds dancing afar...
The warm breeze gushing through your hair
Making it waver in all directions
Large drops of rain falling on your face
As you raise your head up high
With your mouth open
You drink from the sky
Not to quench your thirst
But to feel the freshness inside
The feel of drops bouncing of the surface of your skin
Is what i guess causes goosebumps?
Or is it the chill in the wind...
The green hue of the earth
Contrasting the grey in the sky
The fragrance of the mud
Soaking each drop
Gradually becoming the slush
In which toddlers play
Its beautiful to just sit by the sill
And watch the drops fall by
On the earth's surface
While drops fall from my eyes
Onto my cheeks and below
But instead it's always better
To stand outside and let them fall
Because then nobody'll know
Where it really is raining....!!!
And you love the rain
Well so do i
Its an amazing feeling to get drenched
Under the warm trickles of water
With the sun shining above your head
And the clouds dancing afar...
The warm breeze gushing through your hair
Making it waver in all directions
Large drops of rain falling on your face
As you raise your head up high
With your mouth open
You drink from the sky
Not to quench your thirst
But to feel the freshness inside
The feel of drops bouncing of the surface of your skin
Is what i guess causes goosebumps?
Or is it the chill in the wind...
The green hue of the earth
Contrasting the grey in the sky
The fragrance of the mud
Soaking each drop
Gradually becoming the slush
In which toddlers play
Its beautiful to just sit by the sill
And watch the drops fall by
On the earth's surface
While drops fall from my eyes
Onto my cheeks and below
But instead it's always better
To stand outside and let them fall
Because then nobody'll know
Where it really is raining....!!!
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