Hmm...I wish...!!!!!

Consequences of the lack of sleep:

I want to get drunk…like really drunk…and live in a bubble for just a bit…a bit that takes away irritation and fear…where all I would do is smile incessantly for no damn reason at all (while I write this I can feel the corners of my lips spread a little at the image of my cackling laughter)…I want the world to go round and round…spinning around my face…so that everything appears blurred and funny…and laugh some more at the funny part of the blurring…I want some loud and indecipherable music playing around me…something that makes me head bob from side to side…I want not to feel the floor beneath my footsteps…like I’m walking in the clouds or something…I want to dance under the moonlight…with nobody watching, taking pictures or recording…and I want to finally free fall…with my arms spread open…a serene smile on my face…the wind in my hair and through my clothes causing goose flesh to form...fall into blissful sleep…

What I don’t wanna do though, is puke…that would be like a smashing fall back to reality…

There you are…nothing has changed about you…maybe a few wrinkles more…but the laugh is the same…the mischievous glint in your eyes is the same…the same walk…the same intelligent talk…and then you look at me…something has changed…I see a difference…’I love you’ is the first thing you say to me…how I’ve longed to hear you say this…how I’ve longed to hear these words from you…at another time, long before now I would have given anything to hear this from you…but now, like right now, it doesn’t matter…things have surely changed…your words fall over my ears touching no part of me…I feel nothing…no happiness, no sorrow…no excitement, no remorse…I don’t even feel regret…I’m standing there before you with absolutely no feeling…cold and emotionless…and there it dawns on me…the true meaning of moving on…nothing about the person in question effects you…not his words, not his deeds…even the memories have seemed to fade away…almost disappeared…wiped clean from the slate…and I’m happy…finally happy…not because of what you said…but because at last, I managed to say the final goodbye…